Title:  The Cuckoo Child
Author: Foxcat (foxcat@btinternet.com)
CONTENT LEVEL: C
Spoilers: Only for season three.
Archive:  You want it?  You got it.
Disclaimer: I guess the child is mine, but the rest most certainly
isn't.  Please don't sue.
Author's Notes: After writing my first fic last week, I suddenly
found myself sitting down and writing another one.  Hope you enjoy
it.  Thanks to Carts Before Horses for all their encouragement.  And
special thanks to the fleet of betas I deployed on this fic – Sam,
GEM, Ren and Anny – for taking the time and trouble to help me out
and for their kind words and insightful comments.
Summary: What do you do when something you need is just beyond your
reach? 




The scrawny child sat on the cold, hard rock at the base of the stone
circle, tucking her knees under her chin and staring up at the
familiar form of the massive device.  The red sky was slowly
darkening around her, bringing with it a cool breeze as the day drew
on into night.  She had always been afraid of the dark, of its unseen
terrors and the black loneliness that crept in with it.  The cold
breeze made her shiver and wrap her skinny arms more tightly around
her legs.   But she did not move.    

Resting her head on her knees, she tried to shut out the swarm of
thoughts that forced their way into her head, clasping her hands over
her ears in an attempt to stop the voices ringing once more in her
troubled mind.

Voices coming at her from everywhere, relentless and remorseless. 
The whispered spite of the elders in the village, vicious words aimed
at her with such venom that she felt their sting long
afterwards.    `She doesn't belong here… she is not one of us…'

foreigner…

interloper…

intruder…

Each word spat over her head as she walked amongst them by old men
and women, crippled in their minds as well as their bodies, huddled
together in enjoyment of their malice.  The child carried the immense
weight of their hatred on her lean shoulders, the burden of nine
years of impotent resentment for events long past.

Strangers…

Destruction…

Death…

But it was not only the elders who had unique weapons with which to
wound the child.  The instinctive cruelty of the very young also
recognised the outsider amongst them, the cuckoo in their nest. 
Squeezing her eyes tightly shut against the images that mocked her
within her battered mind, the little girl saw the taunting faces of
the children in her school as they played together, laughed together
and lived together,  the joyful sounds of their childhood echoing
dumbly across the playground towards her in her exile.     

Blinking back the traitorous tears that stung her dark eyes, Elenna
lifted her head and looked up at the stone circle in front of her. 
Once more she found herself drawn back to this place, and once more
she gazed up in confusion at the huge ring that loomed over her, its
fading shadow falling across her huddled form in an embrace that
somehow gave comfort to her childish heart.   

"I'm not an outsider!" she shouted defiantly into the still evening
air.  "I know I belong somewhere…"

***

Hands thrust into his pockets, head tilted to one side in thought,
Jack O'Neill stood alone on the ramp at the foot of  the Stargate. 
The gentle hum of the machinery was the only sound that filled the
quiet air of the gateroom and the softly blinking lights of the SGC
computers cast a dim glow around the empty room.  The last member of
his team to leave for the evening, he had surprised himself once
again by being inexplicably drawn to the darkened gateroom, an event
that had been happening more and more often lately.  Eyes fixed on
the massive halo of the Stargate, he now felt the force of its spell
stronger than ever before, as though he was nothing more than a
puppet on a string, whose threads were being pulled by a relentless
force on the other side. 

Looking up at the angular planes of the metal iris that covered the
Stargate, Jack felt for the first time the strength of the barrier
that it placed between him and what was on the other side.  There was
something out there, he knew it.  Something that was so close he
could almost reach out and touch it, but which was also being cruelly
kept just a fraction beyond his grasp. 

***

The little girl stretched out her legs and pushed herself off the
ground.  Taking a tentative step towards the stone circle, she
reached out and ran her fingers over one of the raised symbols
engraved around its edge.  It was a language that she did not
understand, its meaning hidden from her, just as so much else was
hidden from her in her life.  Things her mother said she was too
young to understand, that would be explained to her `one day', when
she was older, wiser, stronger.  Elenna kicked the gravel around the
base of the circle in mute frustration.  She needed answers
now.  `One day' was no good to a child who was already only half
alive.  But the little girl knew that her mother could no more
understand her troubled daughter than Elenna herself could find the
words to express her pain.  Dropping once more to the ground, she
sobbed quietly to herself, wondering if anyone would ever be able to
hear her tears. 

***

Looking up at the Stargate, Jack felt a short, tender shock run
through his body as the ghost of a familiar feeling suddenly awoke in
a forgotten place in the back of his mind.  An instinct that was
supposed to have died with Charlie over ten years ago surged through
him, the innate and infallible knowledge that had always told him
when his child was hurt, or in danger or afraid.  Holding his breath
in anticipation, Jack waited for the sensation to take form, to
become tangible, knowing somehow that he was on the brink of a
revelation.  But just as he could feel the answer being placed before
him, a distant sound broke the silence in the gateroom and the
thought dissolved before it was fully formed, and the question
remained unasked.

***

Elenna knew that her mother would be looking for her soon.  The night
air was crisp and cool and she should have been home hours ago.  She
smiled inwardly to herself at the thought of the word `home'.  Had
she ever really had a home here?  A place to live, perhaps.  A mother
who loved her, yes.  But the idea of home was as alien to her as the
symbols on the circle.  For as long as she could remember the only
place that she had ever felt accepted in the world was within the
shadow of the ancient ring.  The villagers whispered of a time when
many travellers had come through the ring from a world far beyond
their own, in the days before the trade agreement had collapsed and
her people had been left alone to rebuild their shattered lives. 
Elenna felt a chill of excitement electrify her body at the thought
of such travel, of the endless possibilities that lay beyond the
circle.  In those worlds she could be anyone she chose to be.  Could
she possibly find a home for herself in one of those other lands? 
Would someone ever come for her? 

***

Samantha Carter looked at the figure of the Colonel standing on the
ramp before her.  Lost in thought, he didn't notice her walk towards
him, or her hand reach out to touch him on the shoulder, taking him
unawares.

***

Elenna jumped.  Looking around her in surprise, she saw nothing but
the dim outline of the village standing bleakly in the distance. 
Relieved, she drew her shawl tightly around her shoulders.  She did
not want to be found yet.

***

"Sir, are you OK?"  Sam asked in concern as Jack span round at her
touch, his dark eyes widening in surprise at her presence.

He sighed.  "I'm fine, Carter.  Just thinking."

"Thinking, Sir?"

Jack smiled.  "Yeah, it happens."

"About anything in particular?"  

Jack looked up at the Stargate.  "No," he said quietly.  "Nothing in
particular."

***

Laira cried out in relief at the sight of her daughter curled up at
the base of the stone ring, her small outline just visible against
the night sky.  Silently making her way towards the sleeping child,
she wrapped a blanket tenderly around her shoulders.  Startled at the
sudden touch, Elenna's eyes flew open in surprise.

***

Jack jumped. 

"Sir, are you sure you're alright?  You seem a little… out of it."

He turned to face Carter, surprised to see the worry on her face as
she looked up at him in puzzlement. 

"Yeah, I'm sorry," he said, running a hand wearily through his
hair.  " I just got the shivers, that's all.  I guess someone walked
over my grave."  

Sam nodded, unconvinced.  "Are you staying, Sir?  It's getting kind
of late.  Daniel and Teal'c are long gone, and I was just gonna head
off myself."

***

Resting her head on her mother's shoulder, Elenna's tired eyes
remained fixed on the stone circle as Laira carried her away from the
Stargate and towards the village, watching until the moment that the
dim shape of the massive ring finally disappeared into the black sky.

***

Sam's voice drifted towards Jack, as though releasing him from his
trance.  Shaking himself free of the strange feeling of unease that
had been upon him all evening, he turned to her and forced a smile…

***

'Is there really a place for me out there?' thought Elenna as her
mother carried her back to the village.   'Will anyone ever come for
me?'

***

"Yeah, I'm coming," said Jack, turning to his back on the Stargate
and making his way down the ramp to Carter's side.  "I'm coming..."