Disclaimer Stargate Sg-1 and its characters are the property of Stargate (II) Productions, Showtime/Viacom, MGM/UA, Double Secret Productions, and Gekko Productions. This story is for entertainment purposes only and no money exchanged hands. No copyright infringement is intended. The original characters, situations, and story are the property of the author. This story may not be posted elsewhere without the consent of the author.

Year Five

"Three," Jack said, holding up his hand with 3 fingers upraised. "Maybe towards the back?" he said, mindful that since Teal'c was with them, somewhere out of the way would probably be best. His Jaffa friend had come a long way in the past five years, but he still had his moments, and Jack was in no mood to spend dinner explaining some trivial matter to him and having to worry about being overheard.

The hostess nodded and picked up three menus, motioning for them to follow her. Jack walked through the restaurant, relieved to find it relatively empty. The place was a bit off the beaten path, a locally owned eating establishment that made up in quality and quantity what it lacked in ambiance.

The walls were plain wood paneling occasionally punctuated with posters of the surrounding mountain scenery or one of the many Colorado sports teams. The floor was covered with a thin patterned carpet in colors designed to disguise any stains and wear.
A few battered ropes of tinsel hung from the corners and ornaments were scattered sporadically along the ceiling, dangling from fishing line so that it looked, at first glance, as if they were floating in the air. There was a tired looking Christmas tree in one corner, gaily wrapped - if slightly dented boxes - at its base. Jack thought it looked like the decorations a person put up when it was expected of them to decorate, not how it looked when someone really wanted to be in the spirit.

"How's this?" the hostess asked, standing beside a booth in the back.

Jack looked back at Sam and Teal'c and, seeing no protest, accepted the hostess' choice. "It's great, thanks."

She nodded and laid the menu's down on the table. "Mindy will be your waitress. She'll be here shortly."

"Thanks."

She walked back up to the front of the restaurant and Jack slid out of his jacket, tossing it into the corner of the booth.

"I'll be right back," Sam said. She walked past him and made her way to the rest rooms.
Jack slid into the booth while Teal'c sat across from him, his massive bulk taking up a good chunk of the seat.

"You did not expect Major Carter to join us?" Teal'c asked, picking up the menu.

Jack shrugged. "You never know," he dismissed not wanting to take up the topic. To say that his relationship with Sam was tense was an understatement. A year ago, after her encounter with the entity he'd actually thought that things were getting serious. And maybe they were. But after Orlin their relationship had taken a decidedly cooler turn. She stopped calling him, started to withdraw from their group activities and, more than once Jack half expected her to ask to be reassigned. She said that she didn't take his actions personally, but Jack felt that maybe she did. Maybe she felt that he'd betrayed her, hell that they all had betrayed her.

A lot of that had changed when she'd been kidnapped. Jack didn't think he could ever forgive Conrad, not for how much he'd hurt her and not just physically. There was a shadow in Sam's eyes now that hadn't been there a few months ago. She was wary, seeming to trust few and, he thought, she only relaxed when she was in her lab, tucked safely behind several layers of security.

In many ways, he was more worried about her now than he was a few months ago. She seemed more fragile than she had been with Orlin and, Jack thought, so afraid of being sent for another psych evaluation that she was doing her best to hide it from them.

All of which only made his recent behaviors all the more unforgivable.

"O'Neill," Teal'c said, pulling Jack's attention back to the present. "Although you do not share Major Carter's feelings, it might be prudent to respect them."

"What?" Jack asked, caught off guard by his friend's candor.

"It is the duty of a friend to assist another in a time of need," he said softly.

"I know," Jack agreed realizing that Teal'c only had Sam's best interest in mind, and that he was her friend too. Teal'c raised his eyebrows, clearly not believing him.

"Hi, what can I get you guys to drink?" a cheerful voice interrupted. Jack turned his head to see a broadly smiling young woman. She had a Santa cap perched on her brown curls and was way too cheerful for Jack's peace of mind.

"Two beers, whatever's on draft, and a water," he ordered.

"I'll get that for you and be right back," she said. Just as she left, Sam returned, her jacket over her arm. She paused for a second realizing that she'd have to choose which of them to sit with. With a shrug, she laid her jacket on the back of the booth beside Jack.

He scooted over to give her room and she slid into the booth next to him. "You ok?" he asked, trying to study her as much as he could from the awkward angle he was at. She was a little pale, her features slightly drawn and tight. He knew that she'd had one hell of a day. She hadn't gone into a lot of detail about her time with Osiris, but Jack also knew that zat blasts hit her a lot harder than she liked to admit. When you add that to a couple of rounds with a ribbon weapon, he figured that she had to be feeling rather puny right about now. He tempered his concern with the fact that Doc would have kept her in the infirmary if there'd been a need.

Jack knew from experience that the best prescription for Sam was a good meal and a decent night's rest. Given their current situation, he couldn't do much about the latter, but he could give the former his best.

She nodded. "Yeah, I'm fine." She picked up the menu, opening it. "What are you guys gonna have?"

"Steak," Jack said. "The one that's about yay thick." He held up his hand, his thumb and forefinger about an inch apart.

"I shall consume that as well," Teal'c said.

"I don't know if I'm that hungry," she shrugged.

"It's been a long day, have a steak," Jack urged. Neanderthal or not, to Jack, a good meal meant meat and potatoes, not the rabbit food that Sam seemed to prefer. At least, he consoled himself, if she went for the salad the portions here were large enough that she'd get a good meal out of it.

"Here we go, two drafts and a water," Mindy said, setting the three glasses on the table. "Are you guys ready to order or do you need a few more minutes?"

Jack reached for his beer, shoving the other one in front of Sam while Teal'c took his water. "Sam?"

"Go ahead," she said.

"Ten ounce sirloin, medium rare, baked potato," Jack ordered.

"I wish to order the sixteen ounce steak," Teal'c said.

"How ya want that cooked?"

"He'll take it medium rare, baked potato," Jack said.

"Ok, and you?"

"Chicken fried steak," Sam ordered, folding the menu closed. "With mashed potatoes and gravy."

"Great, I'll get those started," Mindy said. "It shouldn't take long, we're not that busy." She collected the menus and left them alone.

Sam took a sip of her beer and sat it down with a sigh. "I guessed," he said. "We can get you something else if you'd rather."

"That's ok," she said, taking another sip. "It kinda tastes good."

Jack nodded and took a sip of his own beer. "So, what do you think will happen to Thor?"

Sam looked over, surprised at the topic. She glanced around, looking for someone close enough to overhear. This was another reason Jack had asked for a table in the back. The closest occupied table was at least twenty feet away making anyone overhearing them rather unlikely. She shrugged. "If they can't repair the damage, then he's gone."

"I thought with that whole transferring thing they could fix him."

"No, sir." Sam shook her head. "It's like…if you have two cars and only one engine. If the engine is fried, it doesn't matter what chassis it's in, it still won't run."

"Don't they like ever do a backup?" Jack asked. "I mean, when we had that one bug you shut down the system and restarted things from the backup."

"There is no back up of Thor," she said. "I suggested the same thing to Freyr but…in one of their recent encounters with the bugs that database was destroyed. They hadn't had time to recreate it."

Jack sighed. "Damn, I'm gonna miss the little guy."

Sam smiled sadly. "Yeah, he was pretty good for a…well you know."

"Indeed," Teal'c said. "He was a valiant warrior and will be missed."

Jack picked up his glass. "To Thor," he toasted. Sam and Teal'c did the same, touching glasses with a clink before taking a drink.

A few minutes later, Mindy appeared at their table with their food and conversation dwindled to short remarks and requests for condiments. Half an hour later, Jack leaned back in the booth, setting down his fork as he watched Sam take another bite of the chocolate cake he had deliberately ordered, then 'discovered' that he hadn't had room for.

"I talked to Hammond today," he said, broaching the subject he'd been avoiding all day. "He's offered us a couple of store rooms on one of the lower levels for Daniel's stuff."
Sam's fork froze in mid-bite and she stared in fascination at the tabletop. "We can even have a truck and some airmen to help with the heavy stuff. There might not be room for all his furniture but I figure each of us can take a bit of we need to."

Sam carefully set the fork down and folded her hands in her lap. "I believe Daniel Jackson would approve of that plan," Teal'c said.

"His lease for his apartment isn't up for a couple more months, so we have time on that. But we do need to work on his office," Jack continued, keeping his eyes on Sam. She had yet to react. Her lack of response worried him. Part of him wanted her to be angry. Sam had one weakness, when she got angry, she tended to forget herself and speak what was on her mind. Which was probably why she so rarely lost her temper. He could provoke her he knew. Five years of friendship and comradeship gave him the knowledge of precisely which buttons to push.

But he didn't have the heart to do it, not right now. She looked far too tired and drawn, even after the meal. It would be cruel to push her here in public. But he still knew that she needed to accept the fact that Daniel was gone and the sooner she did that, the better it would be. He made a show of looking at his watch. "We should call it a night," he said, raising his hand to wave at Mindy.

She brought over the check and he pulled out his wallet handing her a credit card. "My treat," he told Sam when she opened her eyes to look at him. She nodded, pushing back the cake plate and drinking the last sip of her beer.

Mindy returned with the charge slip and Jack signed it, returning the credit card to his wallet. Sam slid out of the booth stumbling a little bit as she reached for her coat. "Sam? You ok?" Jack asked, concerned.

"Just tired," Sam said, her lips curving into a thin smile.

"Let me drive you home," Jack offered, now regretting ordering her a beer. He'd wanted her to relax a bit, but not so relaxed that she couldn't get herself home.

"I'm ok," she insisted.

Jack reached for her arm, grabbing it gently. "You don't want to wrap your car around a phone pole," he said, lowering his voice. "Teal'c can drive my truck, I'll drive you home."

"Sir-"

"Sam, please, indulge me in this."

She sighed and stuck her hand in her pocket, pulling out her car keys. Jack took them from her and repeated the gesture, giving his own keys to Teal'c. "O'Neill?"

"Why don't you go back to the mountain? I'll take Sam home, then drive her car to my place and pick her up in the morning."

Teal'c nodded. "As you wish."

They walked out into the parking lot and Jack hunched his shoulders, realizing that the temperature had dropped significantly while they'd eaten. He watched Teal'c climb up into his truck consoling himself that his truck was a hell of a lot easier to drive than a school bus.

Jack walked up to Sam's car and unlocked the passenger door, holding it open for her. The fact that she didn't protest as she got in only confirmed that he was making the right choice. He rounded to the other side and folded himself behind the wheel thankful that Sam was only a few inches shorter than he was so that the seat was adjusted close enough for him to get by.

He shoved the key in the ignition and started the car, reaching out to turn off the fan. "No need to blow around cold air," he said, explaining his actions.

She didn't reply, simply pulled the seat belt around her and snapped it into place. Jack did the same and put the car into gear, carefully backing out of the parking space. Realizing that there wasn't going to be a lot of conversation during the drive, he turned up the radio, filling the small space with the sounds of an old rock song.

He drove quickly through the streets of Colorado Springs, the late hour meaning that traffic was relatively light. Feeling the first trickling of heat, he turned up the fan, trying to warm up the car. Twenty minutes later he pulled up in front of Sam's house and parked the car. He turned off the ignition and looked over at Sam. Her movements were slow and sluggish, like she was on the verge of falling asleep.

Jack got out of the car and walked around to her side opening her door just as she reached for the handle. "Let's get you to bed," he said, reaching out to take her arm.

She pulled her arm free and held out her hand, wanting her keys back. Jack gave them to her and followed her as she walked up the short sidewalk. She unlocked the door and pushed it open, glaring at Jack when he followed her, shutting the door behind his back. "Come on," he said as he ushered her towards her bedroom.

"Jack, I don't need a babysitter."

"Indulge me," he repeated. He needed to do this probably as much as she needed it. He needed to prove to himself that she was ok. That his bullheadedness hadn't caused her any permanent harm.

His gut still clenched when he remembered her falling off the platform, victim of the enemy's zat. He'd come close to losing her today, too damn close. All because he just HAD to go on a mission, even though he knew damn good and well that she wasn't ready. He honestly hadn't cared, he just needed the diversion, needed to get away from it all.

"Only because I'm too damn tired to kick your ass," she said. She led him into her bedroom and tossed her coat on the chair. She picked up her pajamas and glared at him, stalking past him to retreat into the bathroom to change.

Jack stood there for a second, feeling incredibly helpless. Clutching onto something to do, he pulled back the covers on her bed, piling up the pillows the way she liked them.
Sam came out of the bathroom and paused, rolling her eyes. She tossed her clothes on top of her coat and padded over to the bed, crawling under the covers. She rolled over, facing away from him. Jack pulled up the comforter and tucked her in, taking a moment to sit on the side of the bed. "Sam, I'm sorry I was such an ass today," he apologized. She ignored him and he sighed, bending over to kiss her cheek. "I'll come by about 0800. We can go get some breakfast."

He got up and walked out of the room. "I can't just stop missing him," she said just as he reached the door.

He paused. "I don't expect you to."

Getting no response, he pulled the bedroom door nearly shut and made his way out of the house, picking up her car keys from the hall table.

/\/\/\/\/\

Sam took a sip of her coffee, nodding at Siler as she passed him in the halls. Today felt like a good day. She'd slept well last night, amazingly waking up barely half an hour before Jack had arrived to take her to breakfast.

He'd taken her to his favorite place, a small 'hole in the wall' restaurant with Formica counters and a grill that probably came over on the Mayflower, and hadn't been thoroughly cleaned since World War II. Of course, what it lacked in atmosphere and chic it made up for in good simple food.

Two solid meals and a good night's sleep had done a lot to improve her mood. She still missed Daniel, still couldn't believe that he was gone but, just like the last time she'd been shot, the gaping hole was slowly filling in, slowly becoming more tolerable and less painful. There'd always be a scar but, maybe, she wouldn't feel it every time she moved.

Two men walked out of one of the offices ahead and Sam frowned, wondering if she'd just seen what she thought she'd seen. She hurried forward, entering the room without knocking. "What are you doing?" she demanded, staring in horror at the three men rifling through Daniel's stuff. She could tell that things had been moved and rearranged. They looked up at the sound of her voice, clearly caught off guard.

"Ma'am?"

"I asked you a question, Lieutenant," Sam said, letting her rancor creep into her voice. "What are you doing in here?"

"Ma'am we're aah-"

"You're what?" she interrupted. "Looking for souvenirs? Shopping for office furniture? Gonna see what you can scavenge?" she asked, her good mood fading in an instant.

"No, ma'am, it's not like that-" the lieutenant stuttered, fumbling with an artifact in his hand.

"Then what precisely is it like?" Sam demanded. She stalked forward and yanked the item out of his hand, clutching it to her chest. "This stuff is not yours. You have no right to come in here and go through this stuff. It's not yours!"

"Major, if you will just let us explain," one of the other men said, stepping forward.

"Yes, Captain. Maybe you would like to explain to me what you're trespassing," Sam said, turning to face the young captain. He had Daniel's notebook in his hand and Sam reached for it, pulling it out of his grasp.

"Major, we're just following orders-"

"Who the hell gave you orders to come in here and start digging through things?"

"I did." Sam turned, her gaze narrowing when it settled on Jack. "Captain, would you and your team excuse us please?" he asked.

The captain nodded. "Yes, sir." He motioned for his men to follow him and retreated from the room.

Jack reached back and closed the door before standing in front of Sam, his arms crossed
over his chest. "Captain Halsey is following my orders," he said.

"I thought we were going to do this?" Sam asked, fighting her feelings of betrayal.

"We are."

"It doesn't look that way." Sam stalked to the other side of the room. "Daniel had a system. He knew where every piece of paper was. They're messing it all up!"

"Sam-"

"You couldn't even wait could you?" She interrupted, giving into the anger that had been eating at her for the past couple of days.

He's gone. We've got work to do.

"Do you even care?" she asked. "Or are you pissed off that him dying just gave you more paperwork to do?"

"What the hell are you talking about?"

"Did you really hate him that much?" she asked, his blank expression serving only to inflame her anger.

"I don't hate him!" Jack yelled.

"Then why? Why are you doing every thing you can to erase his very existence?" she demanded, stalking back over to him. She held up the artifact, waving it in front of his face. "This is his stuff!"

"NO, it's not!" Jack stepped forward and took the small totem from Sam's hands. "This is some piece of crap that SG-5 picked up two weeks ago. They've been waiting for Daniel to tell them what the hell it was so that Hammond could determine whether or not the planet was worth a second look. That obviously can't happen now. My orders to them were to come and retrieve this junk and take it over to Nyan and make him finally start earning his keep." Jack set the statue negligently down on the table and reached out, taking Sam by the shoulders. "I'm not trying to make him go away."

"Then why can't we talk about him? Why is it, every time I bring him up, you turn away or shut me down? Why do you want to pack all his stuff up and make it go away? I'm afraid to even mention her name!"

Jack stared at her, his eyes narrowing. "Her?"

"What?"

"You said her," he said, his hands tightening on her shoulders. "That's what Jacob did wasn't it?"

Sam shook her head, the abrupt change in topic catching her off guard. "I don't know what you're talking about."

"What'd he do? Pack up all her stuff? Give it away? Throw it away? Take all the pictures off the walls?" Jack asked softly.

"We're talking about Daniel," Sam said, ignoring the memories his words dredged up.

Garbage bags stacked up in the entryway.

Bare nails on the walls.

Icy looks and awkward silences.

"I don't think we are," Jack said slowly. "Because I remember Sara doing the very same thing with Charlie's stuff." He let her go and sank down on a nearby stool. "That was something we fought about, almost as much as we did about how goddamn stupid I was to have my gun in the house." He looked up at her, raw pain in his dark eyes. "She wanted to pack his stuff away. Give it to charity, but I couldn't." He shrugged. "I just couldn't let go. Sam, I don't want to pack up Daniel's stuff to make him go away, I want to pack it up to keep it safe. Whenever he comes back I want it to be here, all of it, waiting for him."

He got to his feet and walked over to her, this time taking her arms in a gentler grasp. "I couldn't do anything to save his life. All I could do was stand there like some goddamn idiot and watch him die. And I can't even begin to understand this whole glow fish thing. But the one thing I can do is make sure that if he comes back…when he comes back," he corrected at her sharp look. "That all his crap is waiting for him."

"I'm sorry," she whispered, his words striking her to the core. "I tried. I really tried."

"Sam?"

"I wanted to help him, I wanted to fix him but it just…"

"Sam?"

"It's not fair. I could fix Cronos but I couldn't…" Her own sense of failure overwhelmed her.

"Oh god." Jack pulled her close and wrapped his arms around her.

"I killed him," she muttered against his chest.

"You didn't kill him. Hell, Selmac couldn't help him. And if Selmac couldn't do it no one could."

"He wasn't as bad off when I tried and-"

"Weren't you listening to Doc?" Jack asked, pushing her back a bit. "He was dead the second he shot out that glass. Nothing short of a sarcophagus could have fixed him."

"You don't know that. Maybe I could have…"

"What? You could have what? Do you know how fucked up he was inside? His organs were turning into jelly. So what if you'd have stopped it, then what? To have him die of infection because all his bone marrow was dead? Or have some souped up cancer eat him alive? He's off doing what he's always wanted to do, go stick his nose in everyone else's business."

Jack smiled grimly. "I'm glad it didn't work. I'm gonna miss him like hell but…I think he'd rather be off doing whatever the hell he's doing than to be stuck here, trapped in a dying body."

Sam slowly nodded and closed her eyes, trying to ignore the tears that choked her throat. She felt Jack pull her close again and she sank into him, taking comfort from his warm presence. "Ssh, ssh, it's ok. It's ok," he crooned, one hand stroking her back.

She stood there for several minutes, allowing herself the luxury of his comfort. She didn't care that they were on base. Didn't care that it was wrong. Didn't care that anyone could walk in and see them.

She felt his arms loosen and she sniffled, acknowledging that the moment was over. "I should probably find Captain Halsey and-"

"He'll understand," Jack interrupted. "Sam, no one but us is going to pack up Daniel's things. And you have my word, we're going to pack up every last piece of paper and keep everything for him, no matter how long it takes him to come back. I swear to you, I'm not trying to forget him or make him go away," he said honestly.

Sam grinned, aware of what he was doing. "Thank you."

"You know, I didn't come down here to save you from kicking Halsey's ass." Jack reached into his pocket and pulled out a small box. "This is for you."

"Jack?" Sam frowned, staring at the small white box.

"Just open it." She took it from him and pulled off the top. She folded back the tissue paper and stared at the tiny item within.

"What is it?" she asked, picking up the small item. She could tell by the smell that it was made of cedar. The letters of Daniel's name were cut out probably with a jig saw creating the appearance of a small ribbon of wood folding in and upon itself to create his name.

"The Jaffa got this belief. As long as you remember a warrior's name, they never die."

Fresh tears welled up as Sam's finger traced the ribbon of wood, feeling the smooth surface under her fingertips. It felt warm, almost as if it was alive. Almost as if it contained the spirit of the person whose name it spelled.

"He'll be back, Sam," he said. "Don't ask me know I know but…he'll be back."

~Fin~

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